The Corporate Life

29 09 2010

Items I have learned today:

  • Flicking something over = finding it in your emails/documents and sending it over to another party
  • EOD does not exist, over here its COB = close of business (I think)
  • Lodging it through = Officially filing/registering a document

American english is apparently ALL WRONG.. Australian’s speak english from ENGLAND (or so I have been educated) so therefore it is only the correct and official version of the language.  So please take note that:

  • Tire is now tyre
  • Organization is now organisation
  • Color is now colour
  • Flavor is now flavour
  • Tartar sauce is tartare sauce
  • Theater is theatre
  • the letter “z” is pronounced “zed”
  • and so on and so forth. Not using said terms could result in you being called a “yank”

The work environment has actually proven to be quite fun.  There are basically only two colors that the women wear here in the office – black and black, with maybe a little bit of black.  Which has been interesting for me and my wardrobe of predominately brown.  I have sort of started to accept the fact that I am going to stand out here a bit.

I am just wrapping up my first week on the job, and I have another four to go.  The people I work with are fantastic.  We went to lunch on my first day and our waiter was American (of course, go figure).  Lloyd, my fabulous co-worker decided to share with him “how keen on him all the girls were.”  Sigh, luckily he was cute.. but the fact remained that Lloyd had known me less than 10 minutes and was already trying to “help the Seattle girl out.”  Lunch conversation then moved onto who was hot in the office, who has done who, who wants to do who and so on…

I mainly work with a girl named Bella (who’s position I am covering), and Jane (who is the head of the legal).  Oh and it’s called “secretariat team” over here.  Any exchanges with the directors seem to be incredibly formal. It might just be because I am the new girl and they don’t want me to seem retarded, but instead of being able to send out an email and say

“I have something that needs to be signed asap, can you please return it to me by 2:00pm”

I have to write something like:

“the document attached here to with requires your signature in order to be executed by close of business on the 29th September, 2010.  The attached contains the item referred to….” yadda yadda yadda…. I mean henceforth and such on and so forth

Which is great considering my wonderful spelling and grammatical abilities.  But aside from all that, I really do like the job.  As training is being to slow down, I am being delegated with more tasks, which I am quite happy about.  I really am the type of person that loves to be busy and have 50 different things going on.. even if its verifying that one member on the board has signing power (called a bank signatorie over here).

Which brings me to the fashion world outside of the professional context of work.  Everyone (well I should say all of the girls here) literally dress like they are supermodels.  Corrie and Rashi would be in heaven (two friends from home). I, on the other hand, pretty much always feel like I look homeless.   Oh, and remember those rules about brown and black not going together?  Well they apparently don’t exist here.  Brown boots can be (and are) worn with anything.  Dresses with leggings and boots is currently the outfit of choice here which I absolutely LOVE (sarcasm).  I seriously miss the days when I could leave the house with my “boxy” jeans (as my mother likes to call them) and a sweatshirt on.  I mean I still can, I am not going to be arrested if I do, but I will definitely look like an American tourist.

OK, not to bore any non-female/fashion oriented readers of the blog anymore.   We had the “Grand Final” last weekend.  You want to know another rule that doesn’t exist over here? Over time!  Australian Rules football originally was just Victorian (the state I live in here), and then recently was incorporated to cover all of Australia. So, Sydney has one team, Melbourne however, has about 20 (ok that’s exaggerating, but they have a lot).  Anyway, the grand final was last weekend (kind of like the super bowl)… and it ended in a draw, which has only happened I believe 3 times in the history of the sport.  The players speeches at the end were pretty amusing, they went something all the lines of “this is bull sh*t whatever, I guess I’ll see you next week. F*ck you.”  So the grand final TAKE TWO will be this weekend.  I have music festival tickets (I couldn’t make it to bumbershoot, the largest music festival in Seattle because it was the weekend I flew over here, so that was my justification for buying these tickets).  They are devoting an entire stage and audio to the game.. that is how much these people love their sports.  Guess which sport is next? Cricket!! (sigh)

Anyway.  I watched The grand final, take one at a pub in the city called turf bar.  It was thrown and hosted by the program that I went through.  The game was actually really good, and by the time it started I was able to make some sense of it.  Here are the 3 basic rules I know

  • You can not hold the ball for more than a certain number of meters (metres if I want to be speaking english CORRECTLY) so they continuously bounce it down the field
  • You can not throw the ball, you can bounce it with your hand or kick it
  • You can only tackle someone that has the ball (I think…?)

The teams were Collingworth vs. Saint Kilda (two areas in Melbourne).  During half time there was a “pie” eating contest at the pub we were at.  Pies here consist of meat and gravy.  Brian (my roommate) won, which is especially amusing because he was trying to “romance” a chick there (his word, not mine).  Nothing says I love you like shoving pie down your face.

Here are a few pics

The pie eating contest

The pie eating contest

Brian's victory beer

Brian's victory beer

grand final

grand final

Until next time my friends…



One response

30 09 2010

The foregoing to the contrary notwithstanding, Prof. Fitch said the secret to success and billable hours for lawyers is to use plenty of Latin words and run a number of one-syllable words together. It’s meant to impress and confuse the uninitiated, whereas it will provide you with endless amusement. I particularly like “heretofore” and “hereinabove” and “hereinbelow.”

Ah, yes, English spelling. When we returned to the U.S. after I’d undergone serious Anglolinguistic indoctrination at S.O.A.S., I had to de-program. It’s likely to be necessary in your case, too.

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